HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
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I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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