i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
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