i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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