Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
