she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
