Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize