Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
