About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize
