Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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