He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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