WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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