he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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