No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize
