Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
