It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Just high enough for therapy.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
