So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
