I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
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I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
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I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
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