remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Randomize