She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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