That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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