Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
