Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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