That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Randomize
