What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
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Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize