If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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