Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
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he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
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Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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