Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
