I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
