Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
