i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize