Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
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