is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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