if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
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