I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO