i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.