I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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