'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
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