Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize