found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
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