We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Randomize
