wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
