i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
cat food counts as protein by the way
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
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