I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
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