What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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