i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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