and she was petting her beer can
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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