i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
we should paint friendship bongs
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