this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
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