hell yes lets make some ravioli
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize