i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
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