dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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