used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
