btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Randomize